Title: Bleed You Dry
Author: Melissa Tyndall
Review: I read this entire book, I wouldn't have if I had picked this up at the library.
The good:
The setting in the bar, the dream, and the creep who drugged her were clear and I could visualize them well. I wanted to know what happened and so I kept reading. The story was engaging and I liked the characters. Emma was quirky and sweet, Roman was sexy and aloof.
The bad:
I found myself interested until just over half and then I really didn't care what happened. The story started to dissolve with the many typos, misplaced words and messed up tenses. I started finding it difficult to follow. Each chapter was headed with either Emma or Roman, but it wasn't always clear in the chapter who was talking or whose point of view we were reading. I found myself going back to the chapter head to see who I was following, and I found that annoying. When the story went off in another direction or the author brought in a new character, I really had to concentrate to follow it (more then I should have.)
Emma's thoughts and for that matter Romans were going every direction. The story would take a turn in the next paragraph without any set up or warning. I had to keep asking myself questions about what I was reading and try to figure out where the character was or what they were doing leading up to the transition. This got more and more difficult the closer to the ending I got.
The ugly:
This book had an interesting story, but the work to follow it would drive a reader crazy. I finished it, but only because I said I would. I found myself wishing it to just end and when it did I sighed, relieved to be done with it. This book needs work, it needs editing; there are misspellings, messed up tenses, words in the wrong order, confusing sentence structure, blank pages and run on sentences. Thoughts and dialog are both in parenthesis, so I was never sure if it was said or just thought. The story would jump settings with no more than a new paragraph, no warning, no additional space, no chapter break. The transitions from one place to another made no sense, we would be in her apartment and then suddenly it was the next week.
This book had an interesting story, but the work to follow it would drive a reader crazy. I finished it, but only because I said I would. I found myself wishing it to just end and when it did I sighed, relieved to be done with it. This book needs work, it needs editing; there are misspellings, messed up tenses, words in the wrong order, confusing sentence structure, blank pages and run on sentences. Thoughts and dialog are both in parenthesis, so I was never sure if it was said or just thought. The story would jump settings with no more than a new paragraph, no warning, no additional space, no chapter break. The transitions from one place to another made no sense, we would be in her apartment and then suddenly it was the next week.
My honest opinion: Rewrite and rewrite again, then get many more people to read it, edit it, and give you honest feedback. Edit, edit, edit, I've heard many writing say that they cannot edit their own work and that is the truth. The author reads what they meant to write, not what is actually written.
Melissa, I liked your story and it has great potential, but in its current state it is not going to do well. I gave it a two because of its potential, it could be a good story that many people would read and enjoy. But it needs more work. Good luck and thank you for allowing me to read it.
Publisher: Melissa Tyndall/Bo Lin Books; 2 edition (January 3, 2011)
ASIN: B004JN0RAM
Copyright: 2011
Size: 296 kb
Quick Review: 2 stars (out of 5)
Why I Read It: The author was looking for readers to review her new book.
Where I Obtained the Book: The author sent me a code to download this book. I read it on my Kindle.
Synopsis: A vampire lurks in a bar in downtown Nashville, waiting to save Emma Hadley from a murderer. Roman Sykes dreamed of her, of the future, but he can’t foresee how Emma will make him feel or what’s in store for them.
As they grow closer, Emma develops a brain tumor, which gives her the power of telekinesis. But before the duo can decide the fate of their relationship, or what to do about Emma’s health, a villain from Roman’s past threatens their survival. Mara, Roman’s maker and an evil vampire with firestarting abilities, must be defeated before everything he loves burns.
Bleed You Dry is a fast-paced urban fantasy that captures the essence of The South, challenges myths about vampires and reflects the magnetism of love, no matter how hard one might try to avoid it.
Author Biography: Melissa Trydall is a caffeine addict, wannabe ninja, novelist and a poet. She’s a former journalist and had published poems in the Red Mud Review, Words + Images and Number One.
When the Wordonista is not teaching communication or dreaming of travel, she pushes her cats off her laptop to write and wonders what it will be like to never grade papers again.
Tyndall is currently working on a YA series called Demon and Me and a collection of short stories call Love Me Deadly. Her first novel, Bleed You Dry, is available electronically through Nook, Kindle and Smashmouth.
Melissa has a BA in English/Creative Writing and a MA in Corporate Communications from Austin Peay State University. She lives in Nashville and is currently seeking literary representation.
Other Reviews:
Thanks for the honest review. Hope to see it later in a better state.
ReplyDelete